"So it's gonna be forever
Or it's gonna go down in flames
You can tell me when it's over
If the high was worth the pain
Got a long list of ex-lovers
They'll tell you I'm insane
Cause you know I love the players
And you love the game"
Since I didn't blog yesterday with a "Finish this" post, I thought I would blog about a topic of my own. This weeks "Finish this" were not blogs I wanted or could even dive into. The first sentence opener was "my best physical feature is..." and the second was "my spouses best physical feature..." Well, I do not like to talk about my own physical appearance, nor do I have a spouse to brag on.
So for this week I have chosen to blog about a topic that has been filling my news feeds and my own personal life. It is the concept of the "crazy girl." The media has been loving the crazy girl theme lately because of Taylor Swifts newest release "Blank Space." As a known T-Swift hater, I was quick to jump on the bandwagon of hating on another "oh-woe -as-me" Swift song. However, I have come to enjoy the crap out of the song! I actually was jamming out to it last night at the gym. For years Taylor has been portrayed as this crazy woman seeking revenge on the men that broke her heart. And trust me for years, I have been a Swift hater because I felt that her songs and lyrics were self-deprecating and gave young girls the wrong idea about love and life after love. But, this song and the album as a whole give a message with a little bite of dark humor that I loved. It definitely gets the point across.
The song is about an unhealthy relationship and the highs and lows of a relationship like that. Well, it got me thinking about my last relationship. We were never violent but we were and still are definitely both stubborn and extremely passionate. Fights were like world war 3 and it always ended with me in tears out of frustration. Through the years our relationship was like a roller coaster, we were so strongly in love to the point that we couldn't fathom life a part, But, here we are broken up and pretending like the other doesn't exist. But, I think has that relationship made me crazy? Have unhealthy relationships made us all crazy? I have always thought of myself as level headed, but I was so blinded by my love for another person, that I ignore the signs of it being unhealthy. Which if you think about it, is a little bite crazy. I also have to think has that relationship made me crazy as I embarked on the single life again.
There are circumstances that bring out the crazy in all of us. But, why is it that there is this perception that ALL woman are crazy? And if we are, why is it a negative thing?
Woman are scared to put themselves out there in fear of falling for the same type of guy that broke our spirits the first time. And men are scared to put themselves out there in fear of falling for that crazy girl that seems normal in the beginning and then goes bat-shit crazy once they are in the relationship. In a society where "hook-ups", "one night stands", "taking breaks" and "open relationships" are the norm, how is a person able to not appear a tad crazy or on the flip side a complete heartbreaking doucher. There is no standard. One minute both people are totally fine with their lackadaisical free relationship and then the next minute, one is insanely jealous of something that the other person did. But on what ground do you have to feel jealous. No rules or boundaries were made, you are both just floating in limbo, not knowing how the other feels because that would be too much of a commitment. It is honestly enough to drive any male or female crazy. And who gets to decide where the line in the sand is drawn? What makes a person crazy and what define a doucher?
I am pretty sure we need to abandon the idea that every guy in their 20's is a douche and every woman is going to be a stage 5 crazy. Maybe, being crazy is sign of passion and admiration. Love has been known to lead a person to do a lot of "crazy" things but if these things are healthy, what the hell is the issue?
When going into a new relationship, do not be naive but also don't jump to conclusions because your last relationship scared you. Guys, consider the idea that maybe that girl wants to go out of her way for you, not because she is a stage 5 clinger, but because she cares about you, caring is simply who she is. And girls, consider the idea that if he isn't texting you back, he isn't a stage 5 doucher, maybe he is busy or he doesn't know what he wants, so he isn't trying to lead you on. Not every person you fall for is ready to catch you. Just like the baggage you carry around, he has it too- he just prefers to store it in the attic. Where you prefer to carry it around and load parts of it until it no longer weighs you down. Just like men have driven us to point of crazy, there is a woman out there that has driven them to the point of being a doucher.
Don't get me wrong there are woman out there that are just plain insane and guys that are just plain assholes. I have known my share of both but my point is, it's not fair for us to assume that is the norm. Maybe it is time that our society learns to embrace perfectly imperfect moments that lead us to be crazy. And maybe it is time that we stop thinking that being in free "open-relationship" is acceptable. Make a commitment or give it up. Make a commitment where both people know what this relationship is or isn't, I'm not saying you have to marry someone because you like their company. Maybe people would be less crazy, if more people were honest from the beginning. Maybe people would stop thinking crazy was a bad thing, if they look at it from different perspective. PSA to the men of the world-stop assuming all woman are crazy and they are going to stalk you down after one date. And PSA to the woman of the world- embrace your crazy but the good crazy... crazy that is driven out of love, not lust.
Check out Taylor's Video for Blank Space...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-ORhEE9VVg
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